Wotyammum is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, tiresome walrus.

Wotyammum created a charm quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wotyammum, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Wotyammum, he will send minions to preach to you.

Wotyammum's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Wotyammum's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant lead sculpture of Wotyammum in the centre of the settlement.

2. Never think about dark energy.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.