Nabstikvog is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, compassionate cow.

Nabstikvog created the Large Magellanic Cloud three billion years ago.

If you believe in Nabstikvog, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Nabstikvog, it will turn you into a slug.

Nabstikvog's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Nabstikvog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Retreat if three whales approach from the east.

4. Pray towards the north.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.