Hignilsand is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, deceitful whale.

Hignilsand created the Milkyway six billion years ago.

If you believe in Hignilsand, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Hignilsand, she will turn you into a hamster.

Hignilsand's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Hignilsand's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh near great tits.

2. Never think about gravity.

3. Hide from purple turtles for they are unholy.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never pour water over plants.