Dimsatlimdam is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, all-knowing jackal.

Dimsatlimdam created everything that exists five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dimsatlimdam, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Dimsatlimdam, she will jump up and down on your head.

Dimsatlimdam's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Dimsatlimdam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear blue clothing.

2. Dimsatlimdam must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not shave your back.