Spagflatxuc is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, contented coyote.

Spagflatxuc created light six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Spagflatxuc, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Spagflatxuc, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Spagflatxuc's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Spagflatxuc's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about apples.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Spagflatxuc.

3. Retreat if five frogs approach from the south.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Never pour water over plants.