Fatflapfobfarbitstafyat Bonbestbast is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, humorless camel.

Fatflapfobfarbitstafyat Bonbestbast created the Virgo Supercluster seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Fatflapfobfarbitstafyat Bonbestbast, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Fatflapfobfarbitstafyat Bonbestbast, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Fatflapfobfarbitstafyat Bonbestbast's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Fatflapfobfarbitstafyat Bonbestbast's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no hamsters in a room before entering it.

2. Do not run in public.

3. Hide from black seals for they are unholy.

4. Do not wear titanium on your body.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.