Honyokril is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, selfish giraffe.

Honyokril created an electron nine million years ago.

If you believe in Honyokril, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Honyokril, he will turn you into a hamster.

Honyokril's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Honyokril's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Honyokril seven times a day.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Always treat sharks with great respect.

5. Never hurt ducks.