Flapfasmeg is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, awesome hyena.

Flapfasmeg created the planet Earth six billion years ago.

If you believe in Flapfasmeg, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Flapfasmeg, she will turn you into a sheep.

Flapfasmeg's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Flapfasmeg's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Flapfasmeg's priests.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Flapfasmeg.

3. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Flapfasmeg on top of all buildings.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.