Nullsitlam is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, unselfish crab.

Nullsitlam created light seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Nullsitlam, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Nullsitlam, she will turn you into a puffin.

Nullsitlam's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Nullsitlam's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant carbon sculpture of Nullsitlam in the centre of the settlement.

2. Never wear magenta shorts.

3. Erect a giant pink sculpture of Nullsitlam in the centre of the settlement.

4. Erect a large gold sculpture of Nullsitlam on top of all buildings.

5. You must pray to Nullsitlam nine times a day.