Gepfubcid Sanyam is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, overgenerous snake.

Gepfubcid Sanyam created gold four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gepfubcid Sanyam, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Gepfubcid Sanyam, she will make you grow a tail.

Gepfubcid Sanyam's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Gepfubcid Sanyam's Holy Commandments

1. Never hop in the presence of goats.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Always help turtles.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Gepfubcid Sanyam.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of silicon.