Kamstragdit is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, loving lobster.

Kamstragdit created the Milkyway two billion years ago.

If you believe in Kamstragdit, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Kamstragdit, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Kamstragdit's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Kamstragdit's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick tapirs.

2. Always treat geese with great respect.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate nematodes.

4. Kamstragdit must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.