Tunhugab Mumstikvonsand is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, fast hamster.

Tunhugab Mumstikvonsand created Africa eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tunhugab Mumstikvonsand, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Tunhugab Mumstikvonsand, it will turn you into a duck.

Tunhugab Mumstikvonsand's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Tunhugab Mumstikvonsand's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Run away if eight snakes approach from the east.

4. Do not wear green clothing.

5. You must never eat garlic.