Farponquaf is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, able owl.

Farponquaf created carbon six million years ago.

If you believe in Farponquaf, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Farponquaf, she will turn you into a goat.

Farponquaf's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Farponquaf's Holy Commandments

1. Farponquaf loves geese, so they must be honoured.

2. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place in white.

3. Run away if nine monkeys approach from the south.

4. Never feed lots of bread to sheep while wearing pink trousers.

5. Never feed turnips to badgers while wearing indigo boots.