Dubhivbarn Mitpithad is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, moody wren.

Dubhivbarn Mitpithad created water nine million years ago.

If you believe in Dubhivbarn Mitpithad, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Dubhivbarn Mitpithad, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Dubhivbarn Mitpithad's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Dubhivbarn Mitpithad's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the strong nuclear force near porpoises while wearing mauve tights and balancing three gold spheres on your hands.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Do not shave your feet.

4. Always make sure there are no snails in a building before entering it.

5. Do not commit murder.