Zanbusquam is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, proud guinea pig.

Zanbusquam created the Milkyway five billion years ago.

If you believe in Zanbusquam, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Zanbusquam, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Zanbusquam's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Zanbusquam's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed cucumbers to snakes while wearing coats.

2. You must pray to Zanbusquam three times a day.

3. Never think about thermodynamics near bats while wearing gray boots and balancing four titanium spheres on your head.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never feed gooseberries to seals while wearing white corsets.