Bangidjab is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, two-faced centipede.

Bangidjab created vertebrates seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Bangidjab, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Bangidjab, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Bangidjab's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Bangidjab's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about enzymes.

2. Always make sure there are no doves in a room before entering it.

3. Never mention goats.

4. Never look at dwarf planets.

5. Never feed cucumbers to ants while wearing shoes.