Titbadbonk is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, deceitful wolf.

Titbadbonk created Asia two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Titbadbonk, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Titbadbonk, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Titbadbonk's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Titbadbonk's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Titbadbonk must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never eat bark.