Fumpinflan is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, impressive manatee.

Fumpinflan created life three million years ago.

If you believe in Fumpinflan, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Fumpinflan, it will turn you into a plant.

Fumpinflan's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Fumpinflan's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never talk about dwarf planets.

5. Do not covet oxen.