Kopdudgabtif is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, ruthless hedgehog.

Kopdudgabtif created the planet Venus eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kopdudgabtif, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Kopdudgabtif, she will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Kopdudgabtif's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Kopdudgabtif's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no doves in a building before entering it.

2. Never feed cucumbers to manatees while wearing shirts.

3. Put Kopdudgabtif first in all things.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.

5. Do not drink alcohol.