Arntigfob is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, proud raven.

Arntigfob created light two billion years ago.

If you believe in Arntigfob, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Arntigfob, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Arntigfob's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Arntigfob's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Never feed lentils to mites while wearing jumpers.

4. Do not leap in public.

5. Always stare at clouds.