Yamzimstrag is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, all-powerful dingo.

Yamzimstrag created snails nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Yamzimstrag, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Yamzimstrag, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Yamzimstrag's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Yamzimstrag's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place in white.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Run away from pink cats, for they are unholy.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Yamzimstrag.

5. Do not wear black clothing.