Flabarncenfobsiddavhun is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, all-powerful tapir.

Flabarncenfobsiddavhun created Africa five million years ago.

If you believe in Flabarncenfobsiddavhun, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Flabarncenfobsiddavhun, she will cry a lot.

Flabarncenfobsiddavhun's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Flabarncenfobsiddavhun's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt sharks.

2. You must never eat cucumbers.

3. Do not hurt tortoises.

4. Never go into brown rooms.

5. Flabarncenfobsiddavhun loves capybaras, so they must be honoured.