Tabnadlarg is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, weak pig.

Tabnadlarg created Asia seven million years ago.

If you believe in Tabnadlarg, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Tabnadlarg, it will strike you with lightening.

Tabnadlarg's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Tabnadlarg's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured eagles.

2. Never feed wheat to dolphins while wearing yellow dresses.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Tabnadlarg.

5. Never talk about spacetime.