Dosstonfob is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, capable goat.

Dosstonfob created matter seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Dosstonfob, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Dosstonfob, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Dosstonfob's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Dosstonfob's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dark matter near whales while wearing blue skirts and balancing eight carbon spheres on your face.

2. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Dosstonfob.

4. Run away from brown porpoises, for they are unholy.

5. Do not keep seven horses in a large pit.