Ladkomdaplarnmisyik is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, confident fish.

Ladkomdaplarnmisyik created dark energy three billion years ago.

If you believe in Ladkomdaplarnmisyik, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Ladkomdaplarnmisyik, he will turn you into a rock.

Ladkomdaplarnmisyik's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Ladkomdaplarnmisyik's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into fawn rooms.

2. Never look at moons.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never eat melons.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.