Veensidnab is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, selfish goose.

Veensidnab created humankind seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Veensidnab, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Veensidnab, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Veensidnab's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Veensidnab's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick whales.

2. Pigs are not to be trusted.

3. Always help hamsters in need.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Do not covet oxen.