Maddissvogbegfetlag is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, humane aardvark.

Maddissvogbegfetlag created matter four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Maddissvogbegfetlag, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Maddissvogbegfetlag, she will make you grow a tail.

Maddissvogbegfetlag's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Maddissvogbegfetlag's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from brown manatees for they are unholy.

2. Do not speak about corn.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Maddissvogbegfetlag.