Cussdimfarn Mumquagdot is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, narcissistic jaguar.

Cussdimfarn Mumquagdot created the Whirlpool Galaxy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Cussdimfarn Mumquagdot, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Cussdimfarn Mumquagdot, she will not care.

Cussdimfarn Mumquagdot's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Cussdimfarn Mumquagdot's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never talk about pigs.

3. Never leap in holy places.

4. Erect a large tin sculpture of Cussdimfarn Mumquagdot on top of all buildings.

5. Do not chop down trees.