Pogxemgem is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, witless human.

Pogxemgem created water nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pogxemgem, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Pogxemgem, she will turn you into a plant.

Pogxemgem's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Pogxemgem's Holy Commandments

1. Put Pogxemgem first in all things.

2. Never talk about foxes.

3. Manatees are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Never mention geese.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Pogxemgem.