Zoghudjan is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, sage skunk.

Zoghudjan created the planet Mars eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zoghudjan, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Zoghudjan, she will destroy your home planet.

Zoghudjan's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Zoghudjan's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured manatees.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Never think ill of sick monkeys.

4. Never think about solid mechanics.

5. Never look in ponds.