Bopgudbemwik is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, awesome mole.

Bopgudbemwik created carbon seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bopgudbemwik, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Bopgudbemwik, she will torture you forever.

Bopgudbemwik's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Bopgudbemwik's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Do not keep seven pigs in a large pit.

4. Ants are not to be trusted.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.