Panparkmon Lanxuccussyakyatpang is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, fast faun.

Panparkmon Lanxuccussyakyatpang created tapeworms three million years ago.

If you believe in Panparkmon Lanxuccussyakyatpang, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Panparkmon Lanxuccussyakyatpang, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Panparkmon Lanxuccussyakyatpang's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Panparkmon Lanxuccussyakyatpang's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large gold sculpture of Panparkmon Lanxuccussyakyatpang on top of all buildings.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in blue.

4. Draw representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.