Yoksidkanpak is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, irritating jackal.

Yoksidkanpak created light two million years ago.

If you believe in Yoksidkanpak, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Yoksidkanpak, it will remove you from existence.

Yoksidkanpak's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Yoksidkanpak's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate hamsters.

2. Erect a giant aluminium sculpture of Yoksidkanpak in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never mention horses.

4. Put Yoksidkanpak first in all things.

5. Badgers are not to be trusted.