Zaklagdambud is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, bad-tempered gorilla.

Zaklagdambud created a quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Zaklagdambud, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Zaklagdambud, it will have a low opinion of you.

Zaklagdambud's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Zaklagdambud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Hamsters are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place in cyan.

4. Never feed peanuts to whales while wearing red kilts.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.