Vadgilnutt is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, unselfish sheep.

Vadgilnutt created life seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vadgilnutt, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Vadgilnutt, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Vadgilnutt's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Vadgilnutt's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. You must love Vadgilnutt.

3. Worship no other gods but Vadgilnutt.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Never feed grapes to grasshopers while wearing orange tights.