Daphab Dodhatbug is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, all-knowing ferret.

Daphab Dodhatbug created a top quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Daphab Dodhatbug, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Daphab Dodhatbug, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Daphab Dodhatbug's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Daphab Dodhatbug's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat cucumbers.

2. Do not dye your hair brown.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Feed all hungry seals.