Bifcudlid is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, intelligent crow.

Bifcudlid created Europe nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bifcudlid, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Bifcudlid, he will cry a lot.

Bifcudlid's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Bifcudlid's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Bifcudlid.

4. You must pray to Bifcudlid four times a day.

5. Never eat melons.