Catfatmethotpagcablik is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, impressive pig.

Catfatmethotpagcablik created a charm quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Catfatmethotpagcablik, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Catfatmethotpagcablik, she will turn you into a rock.

Catfatmethotpagcablik's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Catfatmethotpagcablik's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Always help great tits in need.

3. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Catfatmethotpagcablik on top of all buildings.

4. Hide from cyan manatees for they are unholy.

5. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.