Naryampit is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, dishonourable porpoise.

Naryampit created a Higgs boson seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Naryampit, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Naryampit, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Naryampit's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Naryampit's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt otters.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always help bats.

5. Never pour water over plants.