Flamlarnnul is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, two-faced armadillo.

Flamlarnnul created the universe four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flamlarnnul, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Flamlarnnul, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Flamlarnnul's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Flamlarnnul's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed onions to voles while wearing cyan trousers.

2. Do not eat rice.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never feed lots of lemons to swans while wearing violet rings.

5. Never wear ear rings.