Dusstifcan is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, wise capybara.

Dusstifcan created a charm quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dusstifcan, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Dusstifcan, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Dusstifcan's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Dusstifcan's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat pineapples.

2. Do not keep five squirrels in a large pit.

3. Hamsters are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Never talk about special relativity.