Nullunmet is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, cheerful lobster.

Nullunmet created dark matter four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nullunmet, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Nullunmet, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Nullunmet's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Nullunmet's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Nullunmet eight times a day.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Nullunmet loves grasshopers, so they must be respected.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.