Bugpom is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, dishonest bear.

Bugpom created parasitic wasps nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bugpom, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Bugpom, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Bugpom's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Bugpom's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about spacetime near grasshopers while wearing cyan rings and balancing seven carbon spheres on your back.

2. Erect a giant pink sculpture of Bugpom in the centre of the settlement.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Bugpom loves manatees, so they must be respected.