Hasarfgar is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, loving fish.

Hasarfgar created a strange quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Hasarfgar, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Hasarfgar, it will be very unhappy.

Hasarfgar's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Hasarfgar's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of bananas to goats while wearing blue jumpers.

2. You must never eat carrots.

3. Never talk about moons.

4. Always help sick ants.

5. Never eat aubergines.