Bedxucktam Gigwapvid is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, charitable mole.

Bedxucktam Gigwapvid created gold four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bedxucktam Gigwapvid, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Bedxucktam Gigwapvid, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Bedxucktam Gigwapvid's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Bedxucktam Gigwapvid's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about quantum mechanics.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never wear mauve kilts.