Quafgofsak is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, benevolent lizard.

Quafgofsak created life six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quafgofsak, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Quafgofsak, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Quafgofsak's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Quafgofsak's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about moons.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Never feed spinach to gulls while wearing blue corsets.

4. Never hurt nematodes.

5. Do not take Quafgofsak's name in vain.