Foncabtarg is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, blissful giraffe.

Foncabtarg created Europe seven million years ago.

If you believe in Foncabtarg, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Foncabtarg, he will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Foncabtarg's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Foncabtarg's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

2. Never bounce near turtles.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.