Hotlinbod is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, all-knowing giraffe.

Hotlinbod created a strange quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hotlinbod, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Hotlinbod, she will not invite you to parties.

Hotlinbod's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Hotlinbod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about melons.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Do not kill geese.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Do not drink alcohol.