Saflipsag is a god.

He takes the form of a small, boastful aardvark.

Saflipsag created the universe seven million years ago.

If you believe in Saflipsag, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Saflipsag, he will turn you into a tree.

Saflipsag's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Saflipsag's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat sharks with great respect.

2. Do not kill tortoises.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Saflipsag.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never feed rice to aardvarks while wearing violet ear rings.