Rulnulwignak Sisbetvid is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, unthoughtful clam.

Rulnulwignak Sisbetvid created Asia six million years ago.

If you believe in Rulnulwignak Sisbetvid, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Rulnulwignak Sisbetvid, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Rulnulwignak Sisbetvid's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Rulnulwignak Sisbetvid's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

3. Never talk about ribonucleic acid.

4. Do not drink water in fawn rooms.

5. Hide from yellow bats for they are unholy.